Kindness: The Essence of Religion

      

     Due to potentially adverse weather condition, I was unable to deliver a prepared sermon at the First Unitarian Church in Philadelphia this Sunday, August 28, 2011 on why I believe Kindness is the Essence of Religion. Accordingly, I am posting it here for consideration and reflection.

     We often refer to our religion as one that of a “Living Tradition” as you will note those words are even inscribed on your gray hymnal. That is to say ours is not a religion that is bound down in creed and or dogma but is one that changes in form as times and needs warrant. We are grateful for its religious pluralism which enriches and ennobles our faith, inspires us to deepen our understanding, expands our vision, and embraces free congregations that co-exist in an environment of mutual cooperation, trust and support. 

     Now I know that I have used the “R” or “Religion” word a couple of times and recognize that many non UUs do not consider our tradition to be a religion and even some UUs are even not comfortable with the term. I also recognize that for some UUs, the term religion conjures up a formalized spiritual dogmatic belief and worship system to which they cannot and will not subscribe. On the other hand I have heard non UUs often expressing the opinion that ours is not a religion – how can it be when “we allow our members to believe and do whatever they want.” Of course, this usually leads me into a five to ten minute response (sometimes to their dismay) that they are over-simplifying and misunderstanding of who and what we are all about.

     I would like to suggest that we not discount and feel uneasy about the “R” word. First, it is necessary for recognition as a legitimate entity for embracing a specific code of ethics and a particular philosophy which we so covenant, affirm, and promote in our Seven Principles that draw on Six Sources. Second, let us acknowledge and feel comfortable about the original meaning of the word which was “to bind.” To be bound in community with each other in such traits as mutual respect, justice, equity, and compassion seeking peace, liberty, and justice for all, I find it not only to be proper and the right thing to do but ennobling even if I am guilty of the sin of  Pride. Thirdly (interesting how often we make expression points in a Trinitarian versus Unitarian fashion), while adverse to labels I find it to be pleasing to be identified with a particular spiritual support and nourishment continuum that honors and respects my ethical consciousness and that of others in a non-judgmental fashion.  

     In seminary, we are taught that a sermon is to be composed of three parts (an Introduction, a Body which is to have a singular thrust, and a Conclusion). So now to finally move onward from the Introduction into the Body and it’s singular thrust to that one element of any religion that I consider to be the it’s very essence – “Kindness.” More commonly the terms “Compassion” or “Love” are put forth as the essence of Religion and while I subscribe and endorse to their intentionality – I personally find “Kindness” more precise in definition, and an attribute more easily understood and I would argue – even practiced. This mantra of mine, if you will, actually became a realization for me from a rather unorthodox source; as well as, more orthodox and theological sources.

       First, the unorthodox source: some of you may remember a performer and social critic by the name of George Carlin who was very popular beginning in the 1970s through to his death in 2008. In 2004 he placed second on the Comedy Central list of the 100 greatest stand-up comedians of all time. Carlin was noted for his routines on language (Seven Dirty Words), politics and religion. Although raised as a Roman Catholic, Carlin was an atheist and frequently pointed out the flaws of organized religion. 

      His routine on Religion and the Ten Commandments that resonated with me went something like this.

      Why was it - when it came to be that the Ten Commandments were compiled and offered up as the tenets of religion, the determination was made that there should be ten? Because ten sounds very official and important and if it was eleven, or nine no one would take it seriously. Ten is a psychologically satisfying number that we see everywhere – the ten most wanted, the ten best athletes, the ten best dressed, ten best restaurants, etc. So maybe having Ten Commandments was really a marketing decision. It seems to have been politically motivated and inflated to sell better. The list could be easily reduced down to a number that is more easily understood and logical. He offers up the following proposals: 

     The first three: 1) I am the Lord your God, you shall have no other Gods, 2) You will not take the name of your God in vain, 3) Remember the Sabbath and keep it holy. This is rather controlling language and every religion contends that their God is the only true one, the one to be honored, and the means for keeping the Sabbath holy varies. Throw these out and we are down to seven.

     In the interest of logic, we will now jump to the commandments: You shall not steal and you shall not bear false witness. In other words stealing and lying are prohibiting the same type of behavior – dishonesty.  So two commandments are not really necessary and can be combined into one – “You shall not be dishonest.”

      Suddenly, we are down to six. Now while combining, there are some others that can easily combined: You shall not commit adultery and you shall not covet your neighbor’s wife. These two really speak to being unfaithful so if we combined them to state that you shall not be unfaithful, we are down to five. Now, I haven’t forgotten the Fourth Commandment: Honor your father and mother. This is another way to affirm respect and worth for your parents. But why should it be limited to just your own parents, how about the parents of others, shouldn’t it be extended to all fellow human beings. But when you think about it respect, faithfulness and honesty all speak to the same value system and could be combined into one commandment of a simpler language – “You should always be respectful, faithful and honest.” Now we are down to three commandments.

     As for the commandment: You shall not covet your neighbor’s goods. This one is totally impracticable as it is in coveting goods that keeps the economy running and provides for jobs. So let us leave it out and we are down to two – the big one – “You should always be respectful, faithful and honest” – and one not yet mentioned yet - You shall not commit murder. Now when you think about it, sad to say but historically religion has never had a big problem with murder. More people have been murdered in the name of God than for any other reason.

     So with all that in mind, Carlin sums up by advocating for just Two Commandments: 1) You shall always be honest, faithful and respectful; 2) You shall refrain from killing even in the name personal religion beliefs and perceived justice.

     Herein, my advocacy response is for just one concise and easily remembered commandment: You shall practice Kindness. The practice of Kindness embraces behaving in a pleasing, agreeable, accepting, favorable, gracious, courteous, sympathetic, respectful, concerned and charitable manner. These are the essential ingredients found in honesty, faithfulness and are in direct conflict with murderous actions. Note my deliberate use of the word practice. To practice means to engage in frequently and intentionally so as to make something a habit or custom of behavior that may not always be innate or in which we are not readily proficient.

     A more recent and reaffirming orthodox spiritual support of my advance of Kindness as an essence of religion came about during my attendance at the Unitarian Universalist General Assembly held just this past June in Charlotte, North Carolina where I had the honor to hear Karen Armstrong speak from her book “Twelve Steps to a Compassionate Life” which I strongly recommend. Karen Armstrong, a former Roman Catholic nun, who has moved on to a more liberal faith interpretation is the author of numerous books on religious affairs and a multiple award winner for her efforts in publishing and structuring an online Charter for Compassion. She sees one of the chief tasks of our time is to build a global community in which all peoples can live together in mutual respect; yet traditional religions which should be making a major contribution is seen as part of the problem. 

     All faiths insist that compassion is the test of true spirituality and that it brings us into relationship with the transcendence that some call God but how many practice what they preach. Each has formulated its own version of the golden rule, “Do not treat others as you would not like them to treat you.” 

     Furthermore, they all insist that you cannot confine compassion to your own group; and that you must have concern for everyone, even those who you dislike. Yet it is hard to think of a time when the compassionate voice of religion has been so sorely needed. Our world is dangerously polarized. Suffering and want are no longer confined to distant, disadvantaged parts of the globe. More than ever it is imperative to apply the Golden Rule globally, ensuring that all peoples are treated as we wish to be treated.

      She goes on to encourage promoting the principle of compassion that lies at the heart of all religions, ethical, and spiritual traditions, calling us to treat all others as we wish to be treated. Appropriately, the question is raised as to what is meant by “Compassion.” In English, the word is often confused with “pity’ and associated with uncritical, sentimental, charity. Actually the derivative of the word compassion means “to suffer, undergo, or experience.” So “compassion means to endure something with another person or to put ourselves in somebody else shoes. That is why compassion is aptly summed up in the Golden Rule. It asks us to look into our own hearts, discover what gives us pain, and then refuse to inflict that pain on anyone else. Compassion is something easily recognized and admired. It has resonated with human beings through history and when we encounter it we feel enhanced.

     In our perilously divided world, compassion is in our best interest. Gandhi memorably said that we ourselves must be the change we wish to see in the world. But how do we start with the demands of compassion that seem so daunting and difficult to begin. Hence in her book she presents a twelve-step compassion continuing development program including such steps as to learning the meaning of compassion, how to develop empathy and mindfulness, and how to love your enemies to the assist us in that endeavor. 

     I, for one, am in complete agreement with Karen’s message of practicing and advancing the principle of compassion. But in my naïveté, I ask - isn’t this another virtuous attribute of “Kindness?” In her talk on compassion at GA and in her book she uses such positive terms as respect, charity, and concern; and not to succumb to expressions of hatred disgust, greed, and vengeance. Perhaps it is a manner of semantics and word-smithing, but I see “Compassion” as a feeling and the identifying with another as a noun and one more component of “Kindness”; whereas, I see “Kindness” more as a verb in the context of expressing, displaying, or performing an overt positive action.

      Finally, in conclusion (by the way, we taught in seminary not to say “in conclusion” and then to ramble on for another 20 plus minutes and so I will try). You may recall that I mentioned that original meaning of the word religion was “to bind.” To be bound in community with each other in such traits as mutual respect, justice, equity, and compassion seeking peace, liberty, and justice for all. This morning I have attempted to convey why I believe that “Kindness” is really the essence. the heart and bonding agent of what I consider to be true religion.

     Easily practiced? Sometimes, like holding a door open for an elderly person or expressing thanks or genuine concern for another. Sometimes not such as when we are cut off in traffic, or behind the sixteen package person in a ten package check-out line, or subjected to someone’s cell phone conversation (I need help with that one). Yet I still believe that every time we can extend an act of kindness, no matter how small, it is never wasted. Kindness Begets Kindness Evermore. May it be so. Amen

Wisdom of OZ

My fellow Unitarian Universalists and spirituality seekers, as I was preparing for this past Sunday’s reflection, it occurred to me that it had been two years since I last spoke on the Zen of OZ and as a devoted Wizard of OZ fan -- the compulsion to return to this subject matter overwhelmed me. Some of you may recall that previously I spoke to “Having a Heart” as demonstrated by the Tin Man and “Possessing Courage” as exemplified by the Cowardly Lion.

Today I close out this Zen of OZ series with some philology that I found present in Baum’s book as expressed primarily by the Scarecrow in his search for wisdom or as he put it “to obtain some brains.” For someone who insists he doesn’t have a brain, the Scarecrow gives an awful lot of thought to what he would think about if he had one. “I’d think of things I never thunk before and then I’d sit and think some more.” The very fact that the Scarecrow craves wisdom means he already has brain smarts.

Let us begin by briefly considering the meaning of Wisdom and of Zen.

Wisdom, as defined by Webster’s New World Dictionary, - It is the quality of observing the soundest course of action, based on intelligence, knowledge, experience, understanding, and good judgment.

Zen practice is Buddhist in origin; it is a form of meditation that seeks to attain an intuitive illumination of mind and spirit. One, hopefully, realizes an “awakening” and spiritual enrichment through the direct individual assessment of one’s own experiences.

It seems to me that the OZ books and MGM movie based on two of the books overflow with Zen wisdom. I saw the Wizard and Glinda, the good witch, as Zen Masters setting Dorothy on the Yellow Brick Road of experience where ultimately, Dorothy does obtain an experience of “awakening”. She finds her true self, a higher consciousness, and wisdom.

Now with regards to the quest for wisdom, one of the first characters that Dorothy meets on her journey to find her way home out of the Land of OZ is the Scarecrow hanging on a pole in a cornfield. When Scarecrow finds out that Dorothy is on her way to see the Wizard of OZ to find out how to she can get home, he asks if he can accompany Dorothy so that he could ask the Wizard for some brains; being that his head was full of straw. Now if I was Dorothy, I probably would have thought – “this is a no brainer” – and replied no but Dorothy being the compassionate one, immediately answered yes.

The Scarecrow then immediately displays some “brain smarts” and points out the road for them to travel. Here we see and continue to see something very revealing. When the Scarecrow is preoccupied with obtaining intelligence, it escapes him but when he lets go of this preoccupation with obtaining brains, he becomes a rather quick problem solver.

Lao-Tzu, a Zen philosopher and poet, wrote” “Freedom from desire, you realize the mystery.” When the Scarecrow accepts the here and now – letting his thoughts flow freely, every obstacle, he encounters becomes an opportunity in disguise. Do we have another Zen Master in the making?

Let’s consider some examples:

· Dorothy can’t figure out how to get the Scarecrow down from his pole. Here, I and maybe you would have the tendency to over-analyze the situation – wondering how the Scarecrow could be lifted up off the pole, was there a way to chop the pole down or cut the clothing hold him there? But the Scarecrow just spontaneously proposes: “If you just bend the nail in the back down, maybe I’ll slip off.”

· When the talking apples refuse to drop down their apples for eating, I might have tried to figure out how to climb the tree or find a type of ladder to reach the apples. But the Scarecrow uses reverse psychology to provoke the trees to throw their apples at him and Dorothy.

· When the Doorman to the Emerald City demanded proof that Glinda had sent her to see the Wizard, the Scarecrow impulsively points to the evidence of her wearing the ruby slippers.

· When Dorothy and her friends were trying to figure out how to infiltrate the castle of the Wicked Witch, it was the Scarecrow who proposed dressing in the guards’ uniforms.

· When the Wicked Witch’s guards accosted them with spears, it was the Scarecrow who instinctively grasps the Tin Man’s axe to cut the rope to a huge chandelier overhead causing it to fall on the guards.

These examples suggests that Nature’s intelligence flows freely and effortlessly when we are in harmony with the creative intelligence of the cosmos, when we know our true Self, we can harness the pure potential of the universe. A means to know our true Self is to free ourselves from over-analyzing, and to free ourselves from our insecurities and worries – when was worrying and obsessing over something ever productive?

We need to free ourselves from our guilt trips, compulsions and need for approval. In carrying around such baggage, we waste energy. If we are stuck in the middle of a cornfield with crows pecking at us, we need to let go. Free that energy, re-channel it, and allow it to manifest itself in more meaningful ways. Accept things as they are – here and now. Our true self is our radiant inner being, our spirit, our higher consciousness, our soul or psyche.

Now I acknowledge that I may have drifted from a pure Zen to a Taoism philosophy here but I believe that both are beneficial considerations to our physical and spiritual well-being.

Taoism focuses on channeling the spontaneous creative force of the universe. Tao does everything by doing nothing. If we align ourselves with it – our talents will flow more easily, effortlessly – and we will realize an unleashing of our abundant ingenuity and creative powers. By keeping our attention on the here and now, everything we wish for - will spontaneously flow from the Tao within us. Remember the Scarecrow, when he accepts the here and now, he lets go and does not over-analyze; every obstacle he encounters becomes an opportunity in disguise.

Cautionary note: Some of you may remember when the Scarecrow got his honorary degree of Th.D. (Doctor of Thinkology) from the Wizard; he self-consciously recites what he thinks to be the theorem for a triangle having two equal sides: “The sum of the square root of any two sides of the triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side.*” But the Scarecrow is just plain wrong. Trying to impress others, he becomes someone without a brain doing an awful lot of talking. By self-consciously trying to use his brain, the Scarecrow puts himself out of sync with Taoism and prevents his natural creative power from flowing easily and effortlessly.

When the Wizard bestows the TH.D, degree on the Scarecrow, his comments remind all of us that: experience is a primary element in acquiring wisdom, and the longer you are on the earth the more opportunities you have for acquiring it. Wisdom does not come directly from book knowledge or facts stored in the brain. It is not acquired from another person. We must learn to engage with life wholeheartedly to reap the benefits of our experience.

Cultivating awareness of our actions, awareness of our thoughts, and awareness of our feelings allows expansion beyond the confines of the judgments, categorizing, and opinion making. This awareness activates the intuitive capabilities of the brain, and develops a matrix of understanding and wisdom that underlies all experience.

Returning to our Zen Masters, it was the Wizard who demonstrated that he lacked the power to impart wisdom and that it was only achievable by setting Dorothy and her friends on a journey through OZ so they might gain the experience needed for them to assimilate wisdom on their own. Then there were Glinda’s words of wisdom to Dorothy on how to achieve her goal [to get home]: “You always had the power within you [to go back home]. You just had to experience it for yourself.”

And what about our friend the Scarecrow? It appears that he did become a Zen Master in that he was recognized that due to the virtue of his recently acquired superior wisdom, he would now rule OZ.

In conclusion:

Wisdom is the guardian of our choices. It helps us to discern the right path at the right moment. It gives us clarity of thought and deeper understanding. We use our best judgment, resisting the pull of impulse and desire. Wisdom gives us the maturity and patience to make sustainable decisions. We seek knowledge, enter reflection and open ourselves to inspiration. We consider carefully, and then act confidently. Through experience, wisdom takes us beyond thought to a deeper knowing. Wisdom grounds us in grace. It is integral to our fourth principle to affirm and promote a free and responsible search for truth and meaning.

Hopefully, I have again illustrated a little of the Zen and Tao philosophy that is contained in the story of the Wizard of OZ. May your journey down the Yellow Brick Road make your life glorious and joyful in every way. Let us be thankful for the gifts of Love, Courage, and Wisdom for this allows us to spread our wings. “May it be so.”

Presented: First Unitarian Church of Philadelphia on May 29,2011

Curriculum Vitae

Personal

Mark DeCourval was born and raised in Flint, Michigan which at the time was a major automobile manufacturing city. His early development benefited by living in a racially diverse urban community during the school year and spending his summers on a relative’s farm; where he learned to care for the animals, harvest the grain fields, and the value of being self-reliant. From the onset he was a studious and intellectually curious boy which resulted in his graduating from high school with honors a year early. Lacking resources to immediately attend college to study for a desired career in psychiatry, he joined the Navy. While in the Navy, he received specialized training as medical psychiatric technician; after which, he was assigned to the US Navy Hospital in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania where he cared for traumatized and geriatric military personnel. Upon being discharged from the Navy and not being able to find a suitable paying job in the psychiatric field, he went to work for a major Philadelphia bank. Soon after his employment had commenced at the bank, he was selected to receive advanced training as a software programmer/system analyst. While employed at the bank, in addition to working in different capacities in the Information Technology (IT) arena, he took on the pursuit of earning a college degree. In his banking career, he realized a position as Vice President in charge of its marketing databases, where he gained valuable insight into recognizing the cause of specific attitudes and behavior patterns and how they translated into a person’s choices and actions. After forty-five year tenure, he accepted an early retirement package with the hope to pursue a long desired ministry vocation. Although he had been raised as a Roman Catholic, around the age of twenty-four he began to realize his personal theology conflicted with that Catholicism and went religion shopping; wherein, he found compatibility with Unitarian Universalism; and therein, the hope that one day he could serve in its ministry. This aspiration has been realized and he is currently serving as an active participant in the Unitarian Universalist ministry.

Professional Experience

Mark is delighted and honored to be a sponsored ministry candidate with the historic First Unitarian Church of Philadelphia, where he also serves on the Membership and Caring Ministry Teams, as well as a Worship Associate. He has prepared and administered entire Worship Services; and preached both at First Unitarian and as a guest at other UU churches. He is currently completing the requirements for his Master of Divinity Degree from the Union Theological Seminary of New York City; where his focus is on pastoral care/counseling and community ministry. During the summer of 2010, he completed an intense Clinical Pastoral Education program that included training as a chaplain at the Hospital of the University of Pennsylvania which is one of the top ten trauma centers in the United States; and where he has been asked to continue working as an adjunct chaplain. He works as a supporter of MANNA, a Philadelphia non-profit agency that provides and delivers nutrition meals to home-bound terminally ill patients. In January 2011, he spent two weeks in Rome, Italy in a program that focused on important crossroads of Ecumenical and Interfaith dialogue.

In addition to his ministry credentials, he holds Bachelor of Science degree and a Master of Science degree from Drexel University where he was a member of the honors society, Beta Gamma Sigma. He is versed in several computer software languages and in administrating customer and information databases. His long career in the banking/financial field has provided him with extensive business management and personal relationship skills.

Ministerial Ideology

Standing on the side of Love and Compassion. In covenant with the Unitarian Universalist principles of respecting the inherent worth and dignity of every person; and in the wisdom of all the world’s religions which inspire us in our ethical and spiritual lives. Providing communal spiritual support and comfort; especially to the marginalized and disenfranchised. Helping to build a Dignitarian World free of rankism and bigotry.